Wednesday, January 30, 2008


Spandex in Puerto Rico is a lot like stilettos in Russia -- they are worn in all weather, by all ages, yet it is unclear whether or not they are meant to be worn as a weapon.

I spent Sunday afternoon on the beach in front of the Atlantic Hotel, which used to be "the Abbey" of Puerto Rico. The beach was filled with gay men in spandex, which I expected, and a large rainbow umbrella. I went in the water and quickly came out after the first wave untied my bikini. According to the head beach boy, the water is really rough during January, usually causing at least 4 drownings. I figured I'd rather not become a statistic.

Later that evening, and also on Monday, I headed to another beach in the Condado. Spandex was everywhere, which got me thinking -- why? Are all of these men gay? They can't be.

The Condado area is obviously becoming gentrified. There were mid-century modern buildings with prada stores right next to abandoned shacks. The gay boys on the beach gave all of their directions in fashionista terms "go past prada, turn right at gucci, etc." which seemed to annoy some of the older, heartier locals. My second highlight of Puerto Rico was the bartender asking me to rename his special Pina Colada at the San Juan Hotel. It was frothy white with specks of pink and blue on top. It of course reminded me of a jawbreaker candy ... hence its new name.

On a final note, I found it almost impressive that the Puerto Rican flag is almost as prevalent as US flags on the mainland, particularly Florida. No wonder we hijacked them.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey! so what's the new name of the frothy pina colada? you're leaving me it Jawbreaker?

You're such a clever, interesting writer--I love reading your blogs!

I'm sending you a few portholes in the next ship pack--don't despair.

Melissa Holland